Have you ever heard the term, self sabotage? Well, I'm living it. My world is complete chaos, every thing about me is a mess. My car, my degree, work, Pickle, my family, everything but me and R seems to be a mess, and even him and I aren't that perfect. My ex co-worker, who I will call A, went to Steak N Shake with me on a lunch break and saw my car. She said my car is messy because my life is messy, or chaotic! This makes total sense. It all trickles down, here's an example. Car is messy because life is messy, search car for something needed, can't find? Then attitude blows, stress rises, you feel bad for having messy car, and end up with a guilt trip and minutes wasted. See?
That is me, and I sometimes feel like I look like Amy Winehouse...ehhh.
I guess it could be worse, I could BE Amy Winehouse.
How do I get from this...
To this...
Without all this?
I really don't want to overdose on caffein to get my life straightened out. I need to figure out my main stress point, the real reason why my life is chaotic, and set a realistic plan to fix it.
Here are the things that I want in life, maybe this is a start.
Career: I have a 10 year plan. I want to be a physicians assistant within the next 10 years. I want it more in 5 years but realistically, it'll take more time. I want to become an lpn within the next two years so I can have a job that will allow me time wise and money wise to live, save, and go to school part time to become a PA.
Closer job: Yes I drive about 100 miles a day for work, it sucks. This would actually help alot of different things in my life. I would spend less time in my car, which means less chances of a car crash, I will get home sooner, and I have less time to make a mess in car. lol. School this semester was difficult especially because 5 days a week there was an extra 2 1/2 hours added on to work because of the comute. That could be studying time which would help in the career and college category.
Another thing this would benefit is money. I am spending so much money on gas and the upkeep of my car that it is really hurting my wallet. That means less money for savings, fun, and massages.
Well this is it for now, I wish everyone a wonderful Sunday and look forward to seeing how everyone did on their Set it Sunday goal, and the new goals that you guys set this week!!!
Hi lady,
ReplyDeleteQuestion for you: are you talking about my life? Because I swear to you, and hope it makes you feel a little better, but you just desribed my life to a T. Especially with the car thing. Even though our problems aren't exactly the same, but go in the same category, I couldn't feel more like you. I've been wanting to vent about it for days but just don't know how to put ALL those problems into a bible lenght post. So thanks for letting me vent through you, because while I was reading I kept saying "thank you!" "I KNOW!"
I just had to replace my breaks, get new tires, get an oil change back to back within the last two months, and last night as I was coming home from a shitty day @ work..my left headlight went out!! Really? Which means that a pull over, and ticket are in my near future :(
Anyway, I think you get the point, and if I come up with a solution, I'll let you know asap. Usually I'm the up beat type that would tell you "it'll get better, we just have to keep going" .. and even though I'm thinking it right now.. I'm a littler overwhelmed and pooped out..the words just aren't coming out.
But still - keep your head up :)
For what it's worth, I think anyone would be a hot mess given your circumstances! I don't know how you manage it all...and give a damn about the state of affairs! Becoming a PA is an awesome goal and one that will definitely take a lot of work. But I believe anyone can accomplish their goals if they put their mind to it. Best of luck!!
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